trinandtonic:

blastortoise:

white people: mike brown robbed that store!

Lawyer: no he didn’t

Store owners: nope

Eye witnesses: nah

white people:

white people: MIKE BROWN ROBBED THAT STORE

people who are paying attention: hey hey did you know that robbing a store is not actually grounds for an extrajudicial execution anyway

(Source: blastortoise-chan)

spoken-not-written:

THE CUTEST THING IS WHEN SOMEONE CAN’T STOP SMILING LIKE THEY SMILE THEN THEY TRY TO NOT SMILE THEN THEY END UP SMILING MORE AND THEIR CHEEKS GO ALL CUTE AND SAPOIDSP[DOSADPSA[]PS[]DSAPD[]SAP

thatfuckingcrowv2:

orlandobloomers:

instead of sending me nudes you can send me 

  • pics of you smiling with ur fave stuffed animal
  • pics of you smiling with ur mom 
  • pics of plants
  • pics of ur dog
  • pics of silly lookin bugs that u find 

send me the nudes while this geek eats a flower

500$ if you want me to eat lunch with you and be ur friend for 3 hours

(Source: swagmage420)

beerito:

are u in love with me? no?? *slides u a chocolate pudding* how about now?

ugly:

faketual:

Perks of dating me: I’ll let you sleep on my boobs

done deal